Balance Work & Life Like a Boss
When we talk about work life balance, we typically think about how to adjust our outer world in some magically harmonious way in order to find a semblance of inner peace. We hire a house cleaner or order our gluten free dinners for home delivery. Maybe we order a new gadget that promises to create world (home) peace. We register for the next training in our profession to feel relevant and up to date. While these things may add time and value to our lives, they do not typically provide the internal freedom we so deeply crave. What we want is for our spirits to feel lighter; to be present in our day-to-day life. Our goal is to be a human being; not a human doing.
I offer that work life balance starts with peace and congruency in our inner world. Peace in our inner world allows us to hear the quiet whispers of what needs to be tweaked in your outer world in order to enter life’s flow.
Outer Life Distractions
When my outer life feels chaotic and messy, my first instinct is to clean up (literally) the mess using a dust cloth and broom. This is never ending and doesn’t alleviate the state of anxiety or angst for long (because there is always dirt. Literally. Metaphorically.) Our inboxes are always full and deleting one thing off the endless to do list doesn’t give lasting peace and serenity.
It’s only when I go inside and listen to what beliefs about myself I’m holding that I can get out of the spin and get grounded again. Beliefs like: “I’m the only one who do things right. I have to do everything. They will be disappointed if I don’t….”
I often have to dismantle old thoughts about myself; how I show up in the world, in my place of business, and in my relationships. When I’m out of balance, slowing down and assessing where I’m {mis}placing my energy gets me back to center.
Finding Balance
As women we are unconsciously domesticated to be pleasant, pleasing and be who others want us to be. We often feel inauthentic and have fear of being real and vulnerable. We are fearful to disappoint others and thus live in a perpetual loop of chasing perfectionism. This takes up tremendous mental and emotional space. We then may overeat, over-drink, overthink, overdo and under self care. We feel guilty when we give ourselves a permission slip to live in a way that nourishes us.
There are several ways to create true, long lasting balance. It’s time to show up in the world and show up for ourselves! What areas of your life do you sit in judgment of yourselves and others? Where do you lack self-love? Where do you squash telling the truth? What do you put into your beautiful body that depletes it? What do you need to purge? In what ways do YOU keep yourself trapped? Be brazen! Leave behind the old, outdated, uncomfortable chains that bind you. When you are sitting in the middle of your true self, your true essence comfortably, your outer life will harmonize and reflect this.
Heather Michelle Tydings is the owner Own Your Evolution, where she offers psychotherapy and life coaching.